Monday, July 9, 2012

I Found the One My Heart Loves

People keep saying, "I cannot believe it has been a whole year already!  Has it just flown by?"

My heart ponders this question.  This year certainly has flown by, but so did the previous six years we spent dating.  Each day that I spend with my love seems to slip through my fingers like grains of sand; each day is different and carefully planned by God to bring us into one heart that beats purely for Him.

When we got married, we received all kinds of marital advice, whether it be: "Never go to bed angry," "Happy wife, happy life," or "Get out while you still can."  But one piece of advice I remember vividly that runs true in our everyday lives was given to us straight from scripture.  In Ephesians 5, Paul talks directly to husbands about loving their wives as Christ loves the church and to the wives, that we need to be submissive to our husbands... I know this sounds very prosaic, especially for the fact that I do not do well with oppressive, Type A guys that take it as they are right about everything and the woman must obey them. Wrong!!  God has blessed Paul with the profound understanding of what God created each of us to need as a man and as a woman.  What this boils down to is that I need to show Matt love through respecting him as man and tenderly speaking to him when I feel like he may be misguided.  I see myself sometimes in my busy school-minded mode, running over his ideas or pushing aside his feelings because I think it is not a big deal.  But it is a big deal to him.  He feels valued in being listened to and having his thoughts heard, not brushed aside.  Your husband is not a child, and you are not his mother.

It does work both ways.  Women are sensitive and need love to be happy.  I have seen friends recently that I have not seen in a long time, and on a regular basis they say, "You look so happy."  I am happy.  Matt has learned over the years what I need and when.  When I am crying, I need a hug and no words.  When I am frustrated, I need him to put things into perspective.  When I am angry, I need time alone.  I am a puzzle that he is still trying to fit the strange pieces together, but patiently and lovingly he figures me out day by day.

Since we have reached our one year anniversary, I wanted to dedicate this blog post to my loving husband, whom I respect for so many reasons.  While I am up and down with my emotions, he is my constant.  He amazes me with his way with people.  He has an ease that attracts even the most closed hearted to him.  He never cares what people think, so doing the right thing is not difficult for him.  He encourages me to reach all of the goals I have set out to achieve.  He forces me to see a situation from the other person's point of view.  He allows me to be myself, even if it means listening to my Sid the Sloth voice.  There are so many things I could say, but I will stop with these few.  I want to end this post with a few flashback pictures over our many years of growing and learning to love and respect each other.

To the man, whom my heart loves for always